FLASH! Donald Trump Doesn’t Want to Be President

I’ve been wanting to write something on the lighter side but it’s hard. 103 people were killed or wounded in Orlando by a madman who lived up the road apiece from where I sit. Nor were these the only episodes of murder and mayhem. A few days before a young man was gunned down at a high school graduation party while trying to break up a fight he was not involved in! A shooting took place in the western part of the county two nights ago–and on and on and on. Galling it is for these poor folks in Orlando to have immediately gone from being cannon fodder to becoming political fodder. To paraphrase the great American voice, Will Rogers, we seem to have found ourselves in a hole, but we can’t figure out that the best thing to do is stop digging.

As I ruminated over this national mess with a friend he said to me, “I’ve been saying for months, Donald Trump doesn’t want to become president.” He launches into a rant about the brilliance of this ultimate gambit of brand building whose aim is solely that, brand building. So I give it some thought. He might be right, but for the wrong reasons.

First of all, by his own admission, Mr. Trump doesn’t do anything that doesn’t make, or have good odds, to make money. One has to survive the presidency in order to make any money. No CEO has the stress and strain of the President of the USA. No matter what the business, you turn out the light at some point, go home, and pretty much know that if you don’t answer the phone ’til morning no-one is going to die. Not so, the President.

The second reason is drawn from philosophy. Socrates said, “All men are political animals.” Hence the beginning of the school of thoughts called, “Political Determinism.” Less erudite was Lincoln, who said, “Once you’re bit by the bug of politics you get a virus from which you never recover.” Let’s face it, pretty much everyone wants to be president. Just look at the battalion of folks who started off this campaign year… I’ve never heard anyone say, “Given the opportunity, I wouldn’t take it. I’d rather sell widgets for a living.” Come on. Air Force One, Marine Helicopters, Lincoln’s bedroom for goodness sake, ghost or not. Who says no? Then there’s that little thing about power and being president.

But then I think, I listen to Mr. Trump say things that say to me, “You know, I don’t know why, but the man maybe doesn’t want to be president.” How do I come to this conclusion? No one says what he says and thinks America is going to pull him to its bosom.

First off, there’s this business about the truth. How does one stand up and talk about the Orlando shooter being born in “Afghan” when by the time that statement is uttered everyone in the world knows he wasn’t and knows that he was born right here in the old ole USA. Also most of us know there’s a “…stan” that is attached to Afghan.

Then there’s this Elizabeth Warren thing. Maybe she brought it on herself with her claim of having a teaspoon or teacup’s worth of native American blood. “Pocahontas” is a little off beat, but it could be construed as cute–once. When pressed for an apology we’re told by Mr.Trump if it were to be forthcoming it would go to the late Indian princess not Senator Warren. But “GOOFUS?” Give me a break. Forget that the woman is an elected official in the United States Senate. Forget her Harvard credentials. Forget her law school degree. Who on earth uses that word anymore? My father used to call me Goodfus. That was at least 60 years ago!

Granted not every president has been Woodrow Wilson, president of Princeton, or Franklin Roosevelt, of New York political royalty. Throw in Jack Kennedy and Ronald Reagan there as well. Andrew Jackson’s English was nothing to write home about, nor was General Grant’s, but he gets a bit of a pass because a lot of the time he was speaking English he was also drinking whiskey. Then there was Calvin Coolidge who didn’t say enough to be judged on the topic. Mr. Trump’s idea of a speech seems to be series of 3 or 4 word clauses followed by an auditory exclamation point. He has probably used the word “disaster” more times than all the president in history combined. How is that style of speaking going to fly at a State of the Union address or at the United Nations? And since the UN is in NY, we can say if he has to use a teleprompter, “Forgedaboudit!”

Nor does he seem to get it that there’s something amiss with the concept of banning immigrants into the land whose history is immigration and its symbol is the Statue of Liberty.

So I think, “Hmmmmmmmmmmmm. Maybe Donald Trump doesn’t really want to be president. Maybe this is a gag, or a trick. Maybe at the convention, David Copperfield will walk up to Mr. Trump, pull at his tie, make his suit disappear and under it will be another person who has decided that in order to be president one has to be presidential and will give a speech that will have a beginning, a middle, and an end, all of it reasonably coherent. Actually, that occurance wouldn’t be any more bizarre than what has gone before in this year of Ringling Bros. Barnum and Bailey politics. So I think, here’s a man who’s made millions, negotiated lots of deals, and is certainly no no dope. He know what he’s saying. Thus he know what he says is making him unelectable. Therefore, FLASH–DONALD TRUMP DOESN’T WANT TO BE PRESIDENT–at least from my perspective